Reviewed By

Christopher Armstead
Look at that face on that box cover, will you?  That there is Jennifer Tse, and she is some kind of beautiful son.  Take it all in because she is really something to look at.  That face is just about perfect.  Jennifer is a model by trade and there is a YouTube video of the young lady giving beauty tips.  I should link to that page because that's probably Jennifer's natural element… Sitting around being beautiful while giving tips on being beautiful.  I only mention this because after watching 'Naked Soldier' I don't believe Jennifer's natural element is kung fu action movies.  But she does do beautiful real good.

Sammo Hung is hardcore cop Chi-Kueng Ling and he's just made the drug bust of the century.  Multiple millions of dollars, the Miami newsman will tell us.  Drug dealers in this reality really don't like it when you stop their shipments so these drug dealers send the crazy evil Madam Rose (Ellen Chan) to murder Ling's entire family.  Everybody.  Including granny who gets the back of her head blown off.  Ling, who is full of bullets right now, was also about to see his ten year old daughter get blown away but Madame Rose has plans for this girl and takes her away as her own while blowing up Ling's house with, so she thought, Ling inside of it.

Fast forward fifteen or so years where that little girl has grown up to look just like Jennifer Tse, been completely brainwashed, given the code name Phoenix and is one of Madame Rose's top assassins.  Kind of.  Not really.  She's actually kind of crappy at it, truth be told.  There's a big hit going down with Phoenix's associates Selina (Ankie Beilke) and Ivy (Lena Lin), along with Phoenix, ordered to take down a number of head honchos.  Selena and Ivy do great work.  Kill everybody.  Phoenix on the other hand… not so much.  She only kills who she needs kill, and leaves witnesses and all other kinds of loose ends.  Phoenix is that always hated assassin that has a heart of gold.  Not a good combination and Madame Rose is none too happy with her.
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Also still around is Detective Ling, still longing for his baby girl he knows is still out there somewhere.  Today he's been brought in by Interpol Agent Sam Wong (Andy On) to flush out Madame Rose and her gang, since he has intimate knowledge about Madame Rose.  First they have to make sure Ling still has it by running some kind of weird test which gets some poor agent beat near to death, but that wasn't enough, I guess, because now Wong and Ling have a big kung fu fight right in the middle of the Interpol cubicles.  Now he's ready.
Because of Phoenix's screw up, the cops have something to kind of go on, which sends Wong to the University for some reason or another where he meets a lovely college student.  It's Phoenix.  They're in love now.  Hell if I know how that happened.  But I guess she is beautiful so there it is. Also, since Phoenix left a little blood behind during her botched hit, Ling knows his daughter is still alive!  Yay!  He also has adopted a daughter in between time that he could teach kung fu to.   Eventually Madame Rose knows what has to be done.  Phoenix will have to kill Ling, unless Ling can convince her that he's her long lost father.  Wire fu nonsense shall ensue.

1992's 'Naked Killer' was pretty sleazy.  In fact I think I'm going to have to watch it again tonight to refresh my memory of it.  2002's 'Naked Weapon' was less sleazy though it certainly had its moments.  A guilty pleasure if ever there was one.  2014's 'Naked Warrior'… hmm… not very sleazy, wildly inconsistent in tone, terribly acted, possesses some of the worst dialog you will ever want to hear but the fight scenes are kind of fun and as a result, so is the movie itself, once you realize that no one in this movie is taking this serious even a little bit.

While the stunning Jennifer Tse is our star, director Marco Mak seem to make the conscious decision not to give her too much to do outside of making her lips and skin glow.  Her dialog was kept to a minimum and her action sequences were either cut in a way to hide fact that the woman isn't much of a martial artist, or spliced in between better action sequences so the focus will be on them and not on hers.  Mak seemed to have a little more trust in Miss Tse's pretty co-stars Lena Lin and Ankie Beilke as there action scenes seem to require a minimum of camouflaging, though I'm pretty sure they aren't martial artists either.

The narrative, as it were, is nonsense personified… to the point it's not even really worth deconstructing other than to mention that Interpol and Madame Rose's organization in this reality are completely incompetent, but clearly the purpose of 'Naked Weapon' wasn't to stimulate one with its deep intellectual tale. And as we mentioned, any movie that opens with and old lady getting the back of her blown off, has a midsection with filled with comedy featuring a gender challenged kung fu duo, then ends with Anthony Wong showing up providing his special brand of Kung Fu buffoonery… this is a film that has a dramatic / comedy tone that is all its own. 

But despite the debilitating limitations that plague 'Naked Soldier', it is difficult be too hard on it because it is clear that this film is not concerned about any of these things.  Show some hot chicks engaged in kung fu fighting and just make up the story as you go along.  I wouldn't recommend that as a blue print for any movie, but it actually kind of works here.
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